#WarOnGrumbling Day 20

I'm grateful that God is so beautiful.

I'm not grumbling but it just was an emotional and tough day visting my mom in Gimli Hospital. On the drive out, with the temperatures hovering near 15C, I stopped to gape at Lake Winnipeg in Matlock just as a float plane hovered overhead. Honestly, it was hard to believe it was November.

When I drove home it was dusk on highway 8, which can be a bit boring. However I felt God beckoning me to gaze on His beauty. And then He rolled out splendor and colors and cloud formations that are almost indescribably beauteous. 

I was listening to Davy Flowers sing "Wounded One" and couldn't help be moved by the lyrics
We lift our gaze, we lift our gaze //
You are higher

Once again, His beauty wrecked me and I wept like a baby all the way home. And for that I'm extremely thankful.

#WarOnGrumbling #40DaysOfThanksgiving

#WarOnGrumbling Day 19

I'm grateful that God has called me as a mother to many. 

Like any mom will tell you, it ain't easy. It's a tad crazy making if I was being brutally honest. But nothing is more fun and ultimately rewarding than walking alongside young people as a mother figure, surrogate mom or hood momma. It's the best job in the world.

Emeka, Lueth, Chol and I at Westhawk Lake

Yoor, Lueth, Muriel, Malachi and I

Adut, Areng, Isaiah and I in Edmonton

Mamitu and me - Gimli

Makoi, Chol and I - Lester Beach

My baby girls Nuni and Abukie with me at Matlock

#WarOnGrumbling #40DaysOfThanksgiving

#WarOnGrumbling Day 18

I'm grateful that my home has become a house of prayer for all nations.

When I think about all the nations who have prayed in my house, I just shake my head in awe. At various times throughout the past decade, I've had prayer meetings, prayer counselling and individual prayer with young people originally hailing from Afghanistan, Belgium, Colombia, Dominica, Djibouti, Egypt, Eritrea, Ethiopia, Iraq, Jamaica, Korea, Liberia, Nigeria, Sudan, Sierra Leone, Somalia, South Africa, Swaziland, Trinidad and even more I'm sure.

Sometimes you just need a mountaintop view to realize how big God's plan is for raising up prayer among every tribe, tongue, people and nation. And I'm so grateful that I've been woven into it.

#WarOnGrumbling #40DaysOfThanksgiving

#WarOnGrumbling Day17

Today I'm so very grateful that I was rescued and saved by Jesus Christ. 

Every once in awhile I get to refect on my salvation and I'm not sure how I was set apart and so many still struggle. Nonetheless I'm eternally grateful.

Grace You've shown me grace
You've lifted my shame
Drawn me with loving kindness
Washed whiter than snow
You have redeemed and made me whole
Jesus You have won me
You have broken every chain with love and mercy
You have triumphed over death
And You are worthy of glory and praise
Love You've shown me love
By leaving Your throne
By bleeding and dying on a cross
That wonderful cross
That took all my guilt and sin away
Shout it out and lift up one voice in worship
Sing it out until all the earth can hear it
Jesus is alive and He saves He rescues and saves

#WarOnGrumbling #40DaysOfThanksgiving

#WarOnGrumbling Day 16

I'm so thankful for night and day prayer.

Today was an extremely off day for me. I have so much on my mind with my mom's condition and then her only brother passed away on the weekend. I seem to be surrounded by death and sadness.

But I have access to a prayer room. And after spending some time in Sanctuary House of Prayer tonight, I started to normalize. 

Then over dinner with my son, I discovered there was a shooting at the 24/7 Starbucks in the Health Sciences Centre. That particular Starbucks has become my secret place, my unofficial house of prayer, especially in the many months my father was in that hospital before he passed away. 

I immediately drove over to see how everyone was doing. The security guards related the story to me and one of the baristas explained how he was a couple minutes late and his coworker was caught in the middle of the melee but remained safe (albeit traumatized). 

They all acknowledged the hand of God in the situation because no one was hurt (and there was only minor damage). The baristas and security were happy to pray with me for continued protection and care, as well as for God's glory to be known in the entire situation, coffee shop and hospital and all its patrons. 

Now to me, that's night and day prayer. Because God has called ME to BE a house of prayer.

Lord, make me a house // Make me a house of prayer
May the fire on my altar never burn out 

#WarOnGrumbling #40DaysOfThanksgiving

#WarOnGrumbling Day 15

Today, I'm grateful for my journals.

For a writer, journalling is an essential way to work out ideas and capture both life's little fragments as well as the big strokes. That I couldn't journal for years was a robbery and the thought of once again staring at a blank page is utterly frightening.

I mostly utilize my journal to record things God is highlighting to me, prophetic words I've received, sermon notes and flashes of revelation or inspiration. It is also the place I record and keep track of my prayer lists, phone numbers and sometimes even the odd to-do list.

I've also been trying to return to morning pages, writing three pages longhand each morning to clear out the cobwebs of clutter, anger or irritation from my mind to free up creativity and imagination. Doing them regularly has proven to be far more difficult. 

Nowadays I simply can't envision life without my journal. It is the keeper of secrets, both my inner life and the things God wants to tell me. 

This afternoon, I finished a journal I started in March and cracked open a new one. Somehow this often prophesies a new chapter of my life. My father passed away during my last journal and my mom will likely pass away in the first few pages of this new one. I've discovered writing down the process is important and documenting these once in a lifetime experiences are albeit deeply saddening, but also priceless beyond measure.

Take Your fingers, God //
Master Potter come mold the clay //
Tell Your story as You mold me //
Fashion a heart that is wholly Yours

#WarOnGrumbling #40DaysOfThanksgiving

#WarOnGrumbling Day 14

Today I'm thankful that Father God always moves.

How do I say thank You, Lord For the way that You love And the way that You come For all that You've done All that You'll do My hearts pours out thank You You don't have to come But You always do You show up in splendor And change the whole room How do I say thank You, Lord For the life that You gave The cross that You bore For the love You poured out To ransom my soul My hearts pours out this thankful song You walk through all my walls Conquered my shame Stepped into my past Fill my world with grace You didn't have to come But You wanted to I say thank You

#WarOnGrumbling #40DaysOfThanksgiving